In a mood

so the other day the youngest says to me “if you check my pulse, I will tell you one good thing”  now he usually balks at the one good thing gratitude therapy so I jumped on board and took his pulse. His one good thing that morning was “I feel happy today” Wow, happy has not been in his vocabulary for a while so I was pretty elated to hear him say that. Then only a few hours later it was ” I am angry” but he wouldn’t or couldn’t tell me about what he was angry about – I think had a conversation with  his brother and then of course I get texts from his brother about how annoyed he is at the youngest. All I could offer was patience and more patience but these days everyone’s patience is wearing a bit thin.  Then the day proceeded downhill from there with his dad getting morose and bout of them pouting and I felt like I was drowning in a sea of black cloud and sticky, gooey mire Psalm 13: again How long Lord , How long will you turn your face from me!!! I even quoted some of this to the youngest just to show him that despair has been around for a long time.  So it was a long , long day.

Over the next few days things did get better , slowly lifting by then I was in a mess , truly and my devotion was about bringing all yourself to God, all your feelings , the good , the bad and the ugly. So I did I had it out with the Supreme ruler of the Universe and let Him have it all – it was not pretty but the up side was that I did  learn something. 1. He/she the Supreme Source is a very gifted listener 2. Nothing surprises this Supreme source. (Psalm 139)

So we are fragile, crushed but not broken, perplexed , confused but not lost , Psalm 13 ends with I will praise the Lord and another Psalm says He will lift me out of the mire, so my part is to look up, focus not on the circumstances ,which can be overwhelming, but focus instead on the promise “your name is written on my hand, I will not forget you  and “I will never leave nor forsake you”


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