Yesterday was a grey, gray day. I am not sure why. Perhaps it was the dingy sky awash with grey, gray clouds. Perhaps it was because we are still awaiting pre approval of one of the youngest’s drugs which has kept him stabilized for nearly a year now and since it has gone off preferred meds from our insurance and his Medicaid won’t pick it up we wait. This is perhaps the greatest reason that it was a grey, gray day. We have been in this wait for a week now and it seems like eons and we are carefully watching the youngest for slips downward back into the dark hole of depression which took months to get out of and back into a doing forward moving place.
It was a day for knitting which I did quite a lot of and making elf hats or gnome hats the pattern says. So far I have made three, they are cute but did not lift the grey feeling of the day. And if I could have, I would have crawled back into bed and not dealt with any annoyances that kept popping up throughout the day, like the medication issue, the renter who has bailed and not returned the keys or paid the rent, and the persistent cleaning by hubby when I and my sore back cannot help which makes me feel less, less helpful, less hopeful, just less.
Today is still grey, but busy. We went out to the eye doctor – the youngest had not been in 10 years and he was a bit nervous so I had to go. And hubby also had to go and get his eyes checked. It took most of the morning. Then the youngest confessed his phone had died so after switching batteries and deciding it was truly dead. We then made a plan to take the gifts the church had collected to the organization in order to get the phone taken care of tomorrow. That took the afternoon and the day is about done. And it is still a grey, gray day.
So for my prayer today is for the sun to shine, the grey, gray to lift. For me to remember the promises of “plans to prosper and for good” from the one true Lord of all – especially in this Advent season, to remember Emmanuel “God with us” because He is with us through the grey, gray days and the bright sunny ones also.